After you Adopt a Shelter Dog: What to Expect, What to Do, and Mistakes to Avoid

Last updated: January 26, 2026

Let’s start with what I learned the hard way about adopting a rescue dog.

For my 18th birthday, I got myself a present: my dream dog. Merlin was a seven-month-old border collie from the shelter I volunteered at.

From the moment we met, it was clear we were gonna be friends. He liked training, he loved playing frisbee. Amazing! I’d always wanted a frisbee dog. I had many plans. Agility! Disc dog competitions! Trick training! All the things!

I dove in fast.

Too fast.

Within the first week, I was taking him places and starting activities. Practicing obedience training at the park. Rushing the integration with my other dogs.

Aaand then the birthday party happened.

Until this point, Merlin had been… okay. Seemed pretty chill. But in hindsight, he wasn’t chill at all. He was dazed and doing his best to hold it together. At the party, the pent-up tension came out.

Out of (what seemed like) nowhere, he started lunging and barking at the guests. He actually bit my uncle. A very measured bite that didn’t break the skin, but still. Oops.

It was a wake-up call.

Or at least it should have been; I still had a lot to learn before I would understand where I went wrong. But now to grownup professional dog trainer Jake, it’s painfully obvious I hadn’t let this poor dog decompress. I hadn’t given him a chance to adjust. I didn’t even know him yet.

Here’s what I know now:

Newly adopted dogs don’t need endless activities right away. Not socialization, not dog parks, not obedience class.

And they definitely don’t need you to jump into solving their behavior issues immediately.

This in-depth article will help you ride off into the glorious sunset with your newly adopted dog. We’ll teach you what to expect from them, what they need, and what they really, really don’t need.

Haven’t picked out your new dog yet? Check out The Insider’s Guide to Adopting a Shelter Dog: From Mental Prep to Picking the Right Dog for You

CHAPTER 1. WHAT TO EXPECT

You are here: the adjustment period

As with any major life change, the early days with a new dog can get preeetty crazy. It’s a time of high highs and low lows.

You paid the adoption fee. Signed the paperwork. Legally, Sparky is yours. But it doesn’t really feel like she’s yours, does it? You might like each other or you might not, but either way, you aren’t family yet.

This weird limbo zone is called the adjustment period. It’s the time it takes for the new dog and all the members of your household to get to know each other and learn how to live together. It can last anywhere from a month to a year, but the emotional rollercoaster usually levels out by the end of Month Three.

It’s important to allow this time period. It’s the stormy turbulent chapter that comes before you get to experience the “happily ever after” part of the story.

You probably won’t know who your dog really is for a while yet

One of the trippiest things about this experience is that the dog you meet at the shelter (or the adoption event, or the side of the road where you found them wandering as a stray, or the backyard of the guy rehoming them on Facebook Marketplace) may not be the exact dog you end up with.

This isn’t because anyone lied to you or anything. It’s because chronic stress dramatically affects behavior. And, well, the rescue/adoption process is one of the most stressful things a dog will ever experience.

No matter how nice the shelter (and there are definitely some nice ones!) being an animal in a shelter sucks. She’s been taken from whatever life she knew, placed in a cage by stressed-out overworked humans, surrounded by stressed-out terrified dogs. And now she’s suddenly in your home surrounded by even more strangers. 

It’s a lot.

Some dogs cope by shutting down. They appear:

• Calm
• Low-energy
• Easygoing
• “So well-behaved”

Others cope by being on high alert. They appear:

• Frantic
• Hyper affectionate (“if I throw a ton of appeasement signals at this stranger, maybe they won’t hurt me!”)
• Reactive
• Crazy
• Noisy
• “Out of control”
  

Neither version is necessarily the dog’s true personality. 

It’s normal for behavior to change after adoption

A quiet, withdrawn dog may become more active or opinionated. A hyperactive, frantic dog may become more chill. A “perfect” dog may suddenly show fear, reactivity, or other big feelings (hello, Merlin).

I’m not saying adopting a dog is a total crapshoot; most dogs don’t turn out completely different from their shelter/rescue selves. The things that drew me to Merlin in the shelter -like his obsession with frisbees and eagerness to learn new things- were core parts of his personality for his entire life. I’m just saying that chronic stress and survival mode tend to result in extreme expressions of our normal behavior. 

Dogs need to feel safe before they can show you who they really are.

What this means for you:

You know how some medications come with warnings like “do not drive or operate heavy machinery while taking this medication until you know how it affects you?”

Same sort of deal here.

To this day, I don’t know if Merlin’s stranger-directed aggression was always there and he was just in too much shock to show it in the early days with me… or if my high-pressure, let’s-do-everything-now approach took a shy, nervous dog and turned that nervousness into something worse. Probably a bit of both. Which is kind of my point.

Rushing into “normal life” too fast can create problems that didn’t need to happen.

Merlin’s story isn’t an outlier, unfortunately. As dog trainers, we see stuff like this all the time. So we recommend taking the Better Safe Than Sorry approach to the adjustment period.

For instance, we’d never take a new-to-us dog to the dog park, or fully integrate them with our existing pack right away. We don’t know how they really feel about other dogs. We don’t know how they handle conflict. We don’t know what our friendly dog (who’s actually been desperately throwing appeasement signals at everyone) will do once they finally feel confident enough to stand up for themselves.

Some other situations to avoid in the first few weeks, even if Sparky seems fine:

• Being around your kids or other pets unsupervised
• Letting your kids get close when Sparky has food or a chew
• Dog-friendly restaurants
• Pet stores and other shops
• Parties or crowded events
• Doggie daycare
• Off-leash walks in unfenced areas

The more patient and careful you are in the beginning, the fewer messes you’ll be cleaning up later.

Keep an open mind

Sparky may not turn out to have the exact personality you expected. Accepting them for who they actually are will enrich your life and make you a better person in ways you never imagined.

And hey, this behavior-change concept goes both ways; it can be a positive thing. Sometimes fearful behavior or separation anxiety goes away once a dog settles in.

Common challenges after adopting a dog

Not listening

Listening requires:

• Feeling safe
• Understanding what’s being asked
• Having enough emotional bandwidth to respond
• A relationship with you

Your dog probably doesn’t have all four yet. What looks like defiance is often confusion, stress, or simply not knowing what “listening” even means in this new context. It might seem intuitive that a dog should know to come running when you call, for example,  but it’s not. Coming when called is not a natural dog behavior. If your dog doesn’t do what you say, it’s because he has not been properly trained to do so. Even if he had some training in his previous life, he has not been taught to listen to you. 

See:

• Do you really have to be the gatekeeper of all good things to get your dog to listen?
• How We Got This “Stubborn” Teenage Dog to Listen and Come When Called

Fear, reactivity, or shutdown behavior

This can be shocking, especially if the dog seemed “fine” at the shelter.

Shelter environments mask behavior in both directions. Some dogs appear calmer than they really are because they’re shut down. Others escalate once they finally feel safe enough to react.

See our fear and reactivity resources:

• What to Do When Your New Dog is Afraid of You
• Why Does My Dog Bark and Lunge On Leash? (Intro to Reactivity)
• A Beginner’s Guide to Helping Your Reactive Dog Get Better

Potty accidents and house training struggles

Yes, even if the rescue said they were house trained. Shelter life can mess up good bathroom habits. Living in a kennel, dogs can develop the habit of eliminating in their living space out of necessity.

And they might have been taught not to pee indoors at their old house. But guess what – peeing in YOUR house still technically counts as peeing outside of their old house! They need time to learn that your house counts as indoors, too.

“Separation anxiety”

I put it in quotes because it usually isn’t actual clinical Separation Anxiety Disorder. Almost all newly adopted dogs (and newly purchased puppies) will show separation-related distress, see. Clinginess, barking when you leave, destructive behavior, etc.

Makes sense; everyone they’ve ever known has left them. How do they know you’re any different?

And sure, it’s possible your dog DOES have true separation anxiety. But as the saying goes: when you hear hoofbeats (dogs crying and barking when left alone), think horses (normal new-home nerves) not zebras (an anxiety disorder). 

We recommend treating your new dog like a puppy who needs normal alone-time conditioning.

See: Help! My Puppy Freaks Out When I Leave the Room. Will I Ever Get My Freedom Back?

Eating very little, or showing no interest in treats or toys

“My dog won’t work for food!” is a common concern. But a lack of interest in food is a classic sign of stress in dogs. If you’re trying to train your dog but she’s unmotivated by the usual rewards (treats, toys, play, affection, etc) it’s almost certainly a sign that you’re moving too fast. But check with your vet to make sure there aren’t any health issues causing this.

“I feel like we made a mistake adopting this dog”

Thoughts like:

• What did we do?
  
• I just want my life back.
  
• I don’t think I’m cut out for this.
  

…are shockingly normal during the adjustment period. So normal that we’ve given it a name: the What The **** Was I Thinking?! phase.

See:

• Thinking of Returning Your New Puppy to the Shelter/Breeder? Please Read This First
• Is Your New Dog Making You Miserable? You’re Not Alone

CHAPTER 2. THE STRATEGY FOR SUCCESS WITH YOUR NEW DOG

If there’s one thing I wish we could change about how we (that’s the societal “we”) bring rescue dogs home, it’s this:

Stop training them so damn much

That might sound weird coming from a dog trainer, but hear me out.

When people reach out for help dealing with some scary or frustrating challenge with the dog they’ve had for like two weeks, they often list all the things they’ve already taught them, like obedience commands and tricks.

Maybe they’ve enrolled in an obedience class, maybe they’re exploring extracurriculars like the dog park, doggy daycare, or even agility class.

Don’t get me wrong – we love people like this!

They want to work hard to make sure their new dog settles in and learns how to be well-behaved. Hell yes. Their hearts are in the right place. They might have dreamed about this for ages and can’t wait to dive in.

(Same. The very same day I adopted Merlin, I took him to observe an agility class. A bit much, kid)

They might have regrets about everything they did wrong with their last dog, so now they’re determined to “get it right this time.”

(Been there, too)

They’re probably also feeling the insane pressure from the Dog World:

“Train these ten things in the first 30 days or you’ll ruin your dog forever!”

“Socialize properly, OR ELSE.”

“There are no bad dogs, only bad owners.”

So I get it. But is all of this training and excitement really what a dog needs during the adjustment period?

Not really.

We need to see this experience for what it is:

Helping a scared, exhausted, overwhelmed, confused, overstimulated, probably traumatized animal recover from their life being thrown upside down.

You want to teach your dog obedience commands, so that they have the skills they need to survive in human society? Fantastic! It is a big accomplishment to teach a dog all those things. I don’t want to downplay that.

But sometimes we do too much too soon. We don’t give the dog time to process. Sometimes, as we’ve seen, doing all those good things causes more problems.

If your new dog…

➡️ Doesn’t seem motivated by anything. Not treats, not toys, not affection

➡️ Or seems EXTRA crazy and frantic about food, wolfing it down and protecting it like they’ve never eaten before

➡️ Acts wild on walks

➡️ Acts younger than their age, like continuing puppy biting into adolescence

➡️ Is restless and can’t settle down

➡️ Or wants to sleep all the time

➡️ Has behavior changes that seem to appear out of nowhere, like sudden aggression in situations where they used to be fine

➡️ Is super fearful

➡️ Seems uninterested in you

➡️ Has separation anxiety (or “separation anxiety”)

…These are signs they need time to decompress.

Postpone obedience class. And definitely avoid board-and-train programs, which make big expensive promises but really just create more chaos and instability during a time when this dog needs to be getting to know you and your home.

The adjustment period priority is…

Earning their trust. Before you can accomplish anything else, the dog must feel safe. She needs to know what to expect on a daily basis. She needs to get to know you and understand how to communicate her needs.

CHAPTER 3. HOW TO HELP YOUR NEW DOG SETTLE IN

What I’d do differently if I could go back and start over with my adolescent rescue dog

SLOW.

THE.

HECK.

DOWN.

Don’t rush into training, outings, and extracurriculars. Keep the first month simple.

✅ Casual sniff walks around the neighborhood.

Get those feel-good brain chemicals flowing.

✅ Zero pressure to meet new people or perform.

JFC baby Jake, what are you doing taking Merlin to Petsmart and busy parks and making him tag along to your other dog’s agility class STOP WHYYY

✅ Almost no direct contact with my other dogs. Prioritize a slow, highly structured integration process.

(hahaha yeah that’s a cautionary tale for another day 🙃)

✅ Focus on building our relationship and showing him that he could trust me.

At that point, I was a nice useful stranger who could throw his Frisbees for him. Not someone he trusted to keep him safe.

Take the pressure off and let them decompress

Decompression is about giving your dog room to breathe and unclench.

For most shelter dogs, life before adoption involved constant vigilance, noise, uncertainty, and no control over what happened to them. Decompression is the process of letting their poor little fried nervous system stand down from that state. Often for the first time in a long while.

It means we’ve gotta rein in our excitement and give them at least a few weeks of calm. Keeping expectations low and placing as few demands on them as possible. Instead of asking them to adapt to everything immediately, you shrink their world so it feels manageable.

What this can look like in practice:

• Keeping the first few weeks intentionally small: home, yard, quiet neighborhood walks. Not dog parks, not group classes, not busy public spaces.
• Letting your dog observe new things from a distance instead of being dropped right into the middle of them.
• Choosing activities that allow your dog to opt in or opt out, rather than ones that trap them in close proximity to people, dogs, or noise.

Sleep, sleep, and more sleep

Your dog is probably exhausted.

Most shelter dogs arrive in their new homes chronically sleep-deprived. Even the best shelters are loud, bright, uncomfortable, busy places. Not exactly conducive to a good nap. 

Plus, during the first days and weeks in a new home, your dog’s brain is working overtime: processing new sounds, routines, people, expectations, and environments. That level of cognitive and emotional load is exhausting, even if your dog doesn’t look tired.

Overtired dogs don’t always look tired. They look WIRED

In dogs (especially young dogs), overtiredness often looks like:

• Pacing
• Hyperactivity
• Inability to settle
• Poor impulse control
• Exaggerated reactions
• Frantic or “busy” behavior
  

That’s why the instinct to add more exercise or stimulation can backfire. Piling on walks, playdates, training sessions, and “mental stimulation” may keep them stuck in overdrive.

Predictability creates a sense of safety

One of the best ways to build a dog’s confidence is to give them the ability to predict their day. You don’t usually need a strictly regimented daily schedule, but having things like meals and walks happen around the same time every day can help dogs relax.

Provide outlets for natural dogly behaviors

Taking things slow doesn’t mean doing nothing. One of the greatest gifts you can give your new buddy is the ability to just… be a dog. Sniffing, chewing, destroying stuff, digging, rolling in smelly things, etc. These things relieve stress and help dogs unwind.

There’s a good chance they haven’t been able to just be a dog in a long time, or have even been punished for these things.

See:

• How Enrichment Can Help Your Dog Be Happier and Better Behaved
• 12 Ways To Exercise Your Dog Without Walking Them

CHAPTER 4. HOW TO BUILD GOOD HABITS FROM THE BEGINNING

Set them up to make good choices

When a new dog lands in a confusing environment with too many options (aka too many ways to get it wrong), they’re more likely to make choices you don’t like.

If you’re not careful, this can easily put you in the position of having to tell them “no” constantly. Pulling forbidden snacks out of their mouth, chasing them off the kitchen counters, interrupting them when they pee on the carpet in the next room, etc.

This doesn’t exactly foster positive feelings between the two of you.

And you also don’t want to turn every single “behavior problem” into a big training project. Neither of you have the bandwidth for that right now, I’m guessing.

The easiest solution is to put some thought into how you arrange the environment they’ll spend most of their time.

Good management means creating a space where:

• Almost anything your dog chooses to do is acceptable
• There are clear, dog-appropriate outlets for normal behavior
• Mistakes are less likely because temptation is reduced

This might look like:

• Limiting access to the whole house at first
• Providing several cozy bed options
• Filling their space with a boatload of appropriate chew options
• Keeping shoes and anything else you don’t want to get chewed out of reach
• Putting a baby gate across the kitchen door or, at least, making sure no food gets left on the table or counters

See: Mischief Management: a Key to Solving Dog Behavior Problems

Start house training as soon as your dog walks in the door

Potty training is one of the few training things that we encourage folks to start right away. Done correctly, it removes stress rather than add to it.

Starting right away means:

• Giving them a ton of opportunities (more than you think is necessary) to go to their designated bathroom spot
• Rewarding them when they go
• Close supervision and management to prevent accidents

See: House Training 101: The Basics

Should you crate train your rescue dog?

The short answer is yes, in most cases. It’s not mandatory and you can definitely raise a dog without it, but it usually makes life (and house training) easier.

The caveat: not surprisingly, rescue dogs who spent most of their time recently confined in crates or kennels may have some pretty understandable feelings about being locked in a little box AGAIN.

See: Dog Crates: the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Already have another dog at home? Check out Tips for Successfully Adding a Second Dog to Your Family

CHAPTER 5. HOW TO BUILD A STRONG BOND WITH YOUR NEW DOG

Finally, the whole point of all this work: creating an unbreakable, partners-in-crime relationship with your very own Man’s Best Friend.

While it’s hard to reduce the magic of a strong canine/human bond to a neat little step-by-step formula, there are some tried and true techniques we’ve used to create strong connection with all of our dogs.

To get your new dog to love you, this is a good place to start:

Be patient and respectful, and do fun things together

Ever heard the phrase about making new human friends, “interested is interesting?”

Getting to know this dog and learning what they like and what makes them tick will go a long way towards making them like you.

Get curious. As the weeks go by, pay attention to what Sparky seems to enjoy, and do more of that. This is one of the few things I got right during Merlin’s adjustment period: he loved trick training and playing Frisbee, so we did a ton of that.

Listen to what they tell you

I get this a lot: “Animals love you, you must have a natural gift!” Aw shucks, but I don’t have a natural gift – I’ve just learned a few key ingredients. One of which is: ask before you touch, and listen if they say no.

Keep your body language polite according to dog standards (approach from the side, no leaning over him, no doing that well-intentioned but vaguely menacing thing where people reach toward a dog while insisting “it’s okay, I’m nice, see?!”), and let them initiate all petting sessions.

How to walk your dog to build your bond

Don’t worry about hurrying from point A to point B. Travel in a relaxed fashion, letting the dog stop and sniff all the fascinating smells on your path.

This is fun and fulfilling for most dogs, and they’ll learn to associate you with fun and fulfilling things. It’s also a great way for a stressed-out newly-adopted dog to de-stress.

Bring a container of delicious soft treats (crunchy biscuits usually aren’t exciting enough to keep a dog’s attention on a walk). Notice any time the dog chooses to check in with you, and reward with praise and a treat.

A simple way to make walks more enriching and decompressing for dogs:

Go to an area where it’s safe to spread out a bit, like a park, field, or forest, and put Sparky on a long-line (a training leash at least 6m/20ft long). The long line gives them more freedom to run back and forth and sniff to their heart’s content. It’s a much more natural and relaxing way of moving for a dog, as opposed to being stuck on a short lead.

It also creates opportunities for connection. You might notice that your dog begins to choose to keep an eye on you, or check in with you on their own. My Belgian malinois, River, and I have a game: I stop moving. She looks up at me. I turn and run in the opposite direction. Chase me!

See: This Is Why Your Puppy Sucks at Going For Walks (And What to Do About It)

Don’t be afraid to use food

The way to (most) dogs’ hearts is truly through their stomach.

See: Does Food-Based Training Get in the Way of Creating a Real Bond with Your Dog?

Stand up for your dog

On your grand adventures, you’ll encounter many people who want to interact with your dog. If Fido loves people, that’s cool. But if Fido is wary, it’s important to enforce his boundaries.

If you work with trainers, remember that not all trainers are created equal. Some still use methods that are harsh and outdated. Don’t let anyone bully your dog.

Bottom line, building a relationship is not about becoming the pack leader or anything. It’s about establishing yourself as trustworthy and reliable. Someone Fido can count on to be there when he needs guidance or reassurance. It’s about being fun, having fun, and being someone your dog wants to be with.

See the rest of our resources on bonding with your dog

Relationship-building is kind of our whole thing as dog trainers. We have a ton of content on this in the 3 Lost Dogs Academy membership, if you’d like to join us. For now, here’s some more free stuff on the topic:

• 14 Ways to Get Your New Dog to Trust, Love, and Respect You
• Whatever Tomorrow Brings: Important Things to Know Before (and After) You Adopt a Dog
• Leave the Light On: A Real-Life Reactive Dog Adoption Story
• Do you really have to be the gatekeeper of all good things to get your dog to listen?

CHAPTER 6. RESCUE DOG FAQS

Because Google blesses us with better search rankings when we play their game and structure post content FAQ-style.

How long does it take for a new dog to settle in?

It usually takes a few months. You may have heard about the 3-3-3 Rule: 3 days to decompress, 3 weeks to learn routines, 3 months to settle in. While that can be helpful as a very general guideline, it’s definitely not universal.

Some dogs decompress quickly. Others take a long time to feel safe enough to show you who they really are.

If your dog is:

• Fearful
• Feral (especially an international street dog rescue)
• Under-socialized
• Traumatized
• Injured or sick
• From an abusive, neglectful, or hoarding background

It’ll take longer.

But what matters more than the timeline is how much pressure you put on them while they’re adjusting. Dogs who are allowed to move at their own pace tend to adjust quicker.

When can I start training my newly adopted dog?

That depends on what exactly you mean by “training.”

For the first week or so, building good habits is less about formal training and more about management. Setting their environment up for success. This naturally results in good behavior, which naturally gives you lots of things to reinforce. Instead of catching dogs in the act of getting in trouble and then correcting them, you can “catch them in the act” of doing stuff you like, and give them a treat and/or some happy words.

If Sparky seems happy to participate and seems to be settling in well, you can work on some tricks and basic obedience whenever you want. Like I said, Merlin loved trick training, so we used that as a bonding activity starting around day two.

Keep your expectations in check: don’t stress about polishing commands or getting them super reliable in the first few months. Keep it casual and use reward-based methods.

After about a month, that’s when I’d consider a group class, if you really want to take a class.

That’s not to say that working with a dog trainer is a bad idea – having a force-free professional to guide you through the delicate decompression period is a wise choice. Just as long as we’re clear on the point of it all: to help the dog adjust and avoid creating problems, not to teach a bunch of commands.

What routine should I establish with a new dog?

You don’t need to create a rigid schedule with every hour of the day accounted for; flexibility is important, too. But it’s good to have some things that happen at the same time every day. Like:

• Wake-up and first potty break
• Breakfast
• Dinner
• Bedtime

Write this schedule in pencil, not ink. Metaphorically speaking. Because no plan survives contact with reality. Treat the first week as your trial-and-error week, and adjust your daily routine as you go, and as your dog’s needs change.

How do I teach my rescue dog to pee outside?

The same way you’d teach a puppy:

• Lots of trips to their designated bathroom space
• Generous rewards for peeing outside
• Management and supervision to prevent accidents

See: House Training 101: The Basics

Should I take my new dog to the dog park to socialize them?

Negative, Ghostrider.

You don’t yet know:

• how your dog really feels about other dogs
• how they handle conflict
• what stresses them out
• how they recover from scary moments

We see this constantly: a new dog does “fine” at the dog park a few times, decompresses enough to feel more confident… and then gets into a fight. Not because they’re bad, but but because they finally feel safe enough to say “I don’t like this.”

I’m not saying dog parks are never a good idea. But they come with a lot of risk – and many of the dogs you’ll see there are poorly socialized themselves, which can make things worse for your dog.

I know this can be confusing to navigate, because the advice a lot of well-meaning shelter staff or vets give to adopters of shy/fearful dogs is “they just need to be socialized!” But helping a fearful dog is a lot more complex than that. The process is more about desensitization than garden variety socialization. We can help you navigate this in the Academy membership.

Why does my new rescue dog seem sad?

Not to sound like a buzzkill or anything, but it might be because they are sad. Or fatigued, shut down, scared. We don’t always think about it from this perspective, because getting a new dog is such an exciting thing for us. But it’s usually a more complicated experience for the dog.

They’ve been through a lot. They need a minute.

(It could also be that what looks like sadness is actually illness. A vet visit is always one of the first things to do with a new dog, even if they were given a clean bill of health from the rescuing organization)

On the bright side, this is an opportunity to show them you can be who they need. How would you want to be treated if you’d just lost everyone and everything you ever knew, and you hadn’t landed on your feet yet?

It’s not about “fixing it,” btw. The well-meaning human instinct is to help a sad dog feel better with more. More walks, more stimulation, more outings, more pup cups at the coffee shop, more cuddling.

For some dogs, this is fine. But for most, especially those coming from high-stress environments, what they really need is the opposite: less pressure, more rest, more agency, more bodily autonomy.

Give them the time and space to feel whatever they’re feeling. Make sure whatever training you’re doing is force-free. Don’t add in stressors like scolding or dominance-based shit. If things don’t gradually improve or if they get worse, it’s time to call in a professional.